Mentor Mothers: She taught me how to live positively

Stigma has affected my life.

I become very defensive when I see someone is stigmatizing me or the other person.

I can carry that person in their heart.

And women have committed suicide. Some of them have given birth to HIV positive babies just because they have stigma.

I met Brenda, and Brenda was pregnant and she tested HIV positive. I remember we went out, the two of us, and I told Brenda that I am also HIV positive.

When I went to attend my antenatal clinic, as usual and I found that I’m HIV positive.

My dreams were shattered. I started planning short term plans, knowing that I will not wake up tomorrow. So I waited for the death, for the death and I did not die. My fear was knowing that I was pregnant and also HIV positive.

I thought that I will give birth to a tiny baby, malnourished baby.

So I was afraid even to go to the maternity but through mentorship one on one, ongoing counseling I gained my strength back and my mental health was now okay.

Margaret is the mentor mother.

She gave me time to cry, to open up. She give me time. She never judged me.

Margaret taught me on how I can live a positive life. On how I can reduce stigma. How I can start planning long term plans. Margaret taught me the importance of taking medication daily.

So I kept on taking my drugs on time, on time, on time the way she taught and here I am still healthy after ten years.   

I gained my courage back, my self-esteem. Then I asked her, what can I do to become a mentor mother? She told me, I'll tell you when the when there's an advertisement somewhere so that you can go and apply.

And here I am today.

The advice I can give to other health workers to, in order to help these mothers to be to have HIV negative babies is accept these mothers the way we are. We love to be accepted. We love it when a person accepts me the way I am and treats me positively and does not judge me.

To have a generation that is psychologically stable, a generation that is not depressed will depend on the way a mother is treated, because she is the closest mentor to this child.

Many women never wanted to go to the clinic, for they believed that HIV have not any other way except being prayed for. And when I saw people die I can tell the mother that this is the way to go. I was prayed for, God is good and then also ARV is also the grace that God gave to the doctors to have that wisdom of bringing these medicines on board.

So I am a bridge actually, and I am a role model in the community to make sure that we have health security in our country starts with the person who lives in the community and that is the community health worker.

What I love most about my job is seeing a five year old baby, HIV negative from a HIV positive mother, thriving, doing well, playing.

That's my satisfaction as a mother myself and as a community health worker.